Stigma: Society's True Mental Health Problem

I remember in college, someone in a psychology class saying that it is possible for everyone to be diagnosed with some mental illness, at least to a minor degree. Although it probably is true this doesn’t mean that we can understand the experiences of those who have depression, schizophrenia, or panic attacks. In fact, the case could be made that those with mental illness are the most stigmatized of all groups.

Mental health issues spread across every part of the world. Everyone, either personally, by a family member, friend, co-worker, is effected by it. Yet, as common place as it is, it may be the least understood. It is easy to see why a man with cerebral palsy may need a wheelchair. American Sign Language is appreciated by many as a beautiful language even by those who can’t read it. Understanding why someone is “clinically depressed” is much more abstract and complex. Its hard to understand someone who is fine physically to have problems mentally. It goes against the grain of everything that we have been taught about what is “normal”.

Stigma. It’s a nasty little word, isn’t it? A search on Wikipedia will show that the origin of the word is the Greek word for mark or spot, as in something that marked a person as one to be avoided. And I think that’s exactly how those who have been diagnosed with a mental illness feel. They are seen as crazy and out of control of themselves. Many, rather than try to seek help from psychologists or psychiatrist, try to treat themselves with alcohol or drugs. In fear of being outcast from their own families, churches, and at work, many just hide there mental illness and suffer in shame of not feeling normal. This is sad and, in some cases, dangerous way to live, which often can worsen rather than improve someone’s condition.

All of these issues are a lot to take in for those of us who haven’t personally experienced mental illness. As friends and family members of people with mental health issues, we often feel powerless. We barely understand the few medications we hear about on TV, much less what they do or how they work. We cannot “work out” someone else’s issues. We cannot be an objective third party, like a counselor is, because we love them and see them from our own perspectives already. I’ve seen many family members try to do all this and just give up, writing their loved one off as someone who is crazy and beyond help.

However, I believe we do have one very powerful thing: love and understanding. Our family members, friends, church goers, and neighbors, need to know that we care about them for who they are. What a person’s diagnosis is and understanding it isn’t so important as caring for and loving the person. And once the person truly feels loved, then they love themselves more. This love of self can lead to them going on with life with a mental illness rather than as a mental illness.

Life is about what happens in your heart

Life is not about your limbs working, your eyes seeing, ears hearing, or your brain thinking. Life is about what happens in your heart.

If there is anything I have learned from my experiences with my disability, it’s the lines above. It’s the best way to sum up everything, at least for me. Sure, my life would not be what it is if not for my abilities. But what I have gained personally from using those abilities in my experiences is what has made my life meaningful.

As I read the book, Unexpected Guests at God’s Banquet, which is about the inclusion of people with disabilities in churches, the challenge of the church is clear to me. In interacting with people with disabilities the church must purposely turn from what the outside world views as important - physical and mental ability – and to the spirit, or heart of the person. It’s a call to return to what the church is supposed to be about.

Let’s be honest. When people look at people with disabilities, they have to recognize their frailties as human beings. It’s a reality check, that although we are made in God’s image, fearfully and wonderfully made, we are not gods ourselves. We are not immortal. Our bodies can and do fail us.

Reactions are mixed when people come into contact with people with disabilities for the first time. Out of fear, some avoid people with disabilities with the belief the disability is transferable. The view that disability comes from Sin sounds outdated, but it is still out there. Others automatically assume the person with the disability is enduring great suffering as a disabled, incomplete person. From this perspective some believe people with disabilities are either super heroes who achieve despite themselves, or are in need for others to do everything for them in order to ease their suffering. The worst reaction people have to people with disabilities is just ignoring them. People will stare, realize this, and then act as if they saw no one at all. Not being granted the acknowledgement of existence, as if not human, is by far the worst.

Again, life is what happens in the heart.

It is true, people with disabilities can suffer, but not always in ways people think. The media, and movies have played the idea up the idea we suffer because of our disability. The truth is not quite that simple. True, for people with disabilities doing ordinary things is harder. Reading may be more difficult. Buildings may not be accessible. Communication may be nearly impossible. Yet, as much as accommodations make life easier, its not their limitations that they really suffer from. It’s the fear they see in a strangers eyes. Being ignored as they pass someone in the hall. Hiding their disability to friends or even family members for fear of being ignored as an outcast. Our condition is not what we suffer from as so much as to how others treat us. In my own personal experiences with my disabilities, and my interaction with other people with disabilities, what eases this type of suffering are the people that support, love, and share with them. The ones who want you to experience their lives with them.

The fact is the suffering of a person with a disability is more a matter of human interaction rather than a condition. If a person only encounters pity, fear, and is ignored, it is not surprising that they would feel as if they have no life at all because their heart would experience despair, sadness, and loneliness. Such treatment would cause the person’s identity to become their disability. When a person is loved, encouraged, accepted, they can work through their challenges, accept failures, make mistakes and feel like a whole person. A disability is a trait, and nothing more. They simply feel alive with their heart filled with joy, hope, and love. Life is what happens in the heart.

My vision is that the church ought to be the place where people with disabilities find such acceptance. Follow Jesus’s example to seek them out, and love them for what they are: part of God’s Creation. People, regardless of a disability or not, feel more alive because their heart is happy, full of joy and love. If the church wants to have people with disabilities as part of its church, it must first open its heart to them. It then must work to become a source of acceptance, and love for all. And once all its members’ hearts are filled with joy, the church itself will feel alive.

If the church ever is able to do that, then maybe it will begin to influence society rather than let society influence it.

The Keyhole is born!

With this message The Keyhole comes to life. I am very excited about what this blog could potentially. The vision for this blog is to share the personal insights of people with disabilities with the world on a variety of issues and raise understanding among the web-serfing public. My friends and I hope you enjoy our thoughts, and that they may broaden the world's understanding of life with a disability.